Cheesy? Maybe... but it's real to me. Excited and warm'n'fuzzy all inside. No need to rush... no need to run away. Just stand still and enjoy what's coming. Even though it all makes me anxious, excited and worried at the same time, I'm actually quite proud that I've managed to keep my cool for a while and only had some occasional melancholic moments. I guess it's only human to have doubts, about yourself and others...
Considering that I haven't had something even close to a working relationship for about 2,5 years if not even longer, I'm calm. I know I make mistakes... I'm tip-toeing around the whole thing and my own feelings as well. I'm keeping it real, yet not trying to sabotage the whole thing by worrying too much. If it's supposed to happen, it will anyway... and if not, then not. It's as easy as that... no need to push it hard, it wouldn't speed things up anyway and is that even the outcome I'd want? I think not... so excitement can also be a slowly transforming process.
What is it exactly? Can I even call it a relationship? I guess not... no wows have been given, no mutual "loyalty program" offer signed and sealed. It's not certain... it just is what it is... two people enjoying each others' company. But I know from my side... that it almost instantly turns into a one-person offer anyway... I like him. No more questioning of that. Liked him even before the 1st time I spent the night. It's not hard to feel like that if you've got a person next to you who's loving, caring, good-hearted, friendly and lovable... who simply treats you well, better than you've had in a long time. That good, that it's even hard to believe it's real.
Maybe I am over-dreaming it... maybe. But I think it deserves the amazement. Even when I'm worth it, I will look at it as if it's something that doesn't come by so often (and it doesn't), I'll have my eyes and heart open for something new and heart-warming. I'll just be... in it... and let it slowly evolve... into what it's supposed to be, what it's meant to be... surprised that something great is happening to me... to the both of us.